My Caped Crusader
Whether my dear husband is busy
at Gotham City’s Sherry-Netherland’s Doubles on 5th Ave sweeping ladies off their feet…
or me off mine… 
… giving speeches 
or playing Cricket…
chillin’ or racing 
giving sweet baby kisses
and super Daddy hugs…
…corporate by weekday and
Hearth Warrior by weekend
(God, I love those legs!)
…and whether he’s playing peacefully or keeping the peace,
up in the sky or under water,
dressed up…
dressed down, OR…
barely dressed…
Phillip is funny and
great fun to be around.
A wonderful father,
an animal lover and protector,
a loving husband and great friend to all who know him, I am proud to be his wife, his lifelong partner, his other half.
I’m also proud to work together as co-hosts on our Live radio show, “Let’s Talk!” about Life, Love and Parenting archived on this site after each show for your listening convenience.
The Bright Spot 
– I could not think of a better person to take this life journey with! Take a moment to think of all the reasons you love your special someone and go give that person a big kiss! I’ve just finished this story and am looking for my Batman, my Caped Crusader, my darling to give him a big smooch! 😉 b
Hand me a Volleyball!
Well known for its particularly high satisfaction rating by patients, I am no exception with my bilateral reduction mammoplasty (photo taken next morning): 
With the initial look at my dressing upon waking in recovery, I was simply delighted with the white bralette, my first ever. I felt like someone should hand me a volleyball so I could head to a California beach straight away!
Over 3 hours & hundreds of internal stitches later, Dr. Chang Soo Kim (GCsurgeryandlasers.com) & his amazing team removed nearly 1,500 grams! Find a 3.3 pound weight and put it on a chain & wear it around your neck over your lungs and tell me if you don’t want to rip it off by the end of the week! Not only did Dr. Kim give me the breasts of a 20-year-old, but I could suddenly breathe effortlessly again!!
I don’t blame breastfeeding, I don’t blame aging & I certainly don’t blame weight loss. 
Life started out normal…
And then, what on Earth happened?? I mean, seriously, look at my little neck…
No matter how little I weighed, I was
still a DDD+. Not pleasant when the rest of my body was wearing a size 4.
It translates into neck & back pain, underwires digging into soft skin, and bursting
buttons.
I had never experienced a surgery that would alter my appearance. Between fun, function & fashion, the twins had served their time well.
But enough was enough. Deemed a medical necessity, I was grateful it was fully covered by our insurance. So grateful!! All $91,234.43!
Unless you’ve not been able to bounce on a trampoline with your kids or run through Costcos without getting black eyes or lay on your stomach at the Chiropractor’s or zip up your coat without pushing past the bust roadblock or comfortably enjoy a massage or if you’ve rested your twins on your wrists climbing the stairs or slung your mammaries into the massive nylon cups of a minimizer or released them at the end of the night only to swing like tube socks with golf balls or if you sleep on your side with a pillow just for your top boob or find it difficult to buy a pretty little outfit with straps or take a deep breath without holding up your center bra wire or accidentally hit the delete button with your breast when you’re reaching over your keyboard, then you may understand. Millions of women do. This surgery is life-changing!
And those shocked by my decision only proves I was a master of camouflaging my DDD+ girls with the perfected fashionable slouch, wearing baggy blouses, and, as countless women know, subjecting ourselves to breath-defying minimizer bras.
Dr. Kim & his team were incredibly kind. I even asked to pray before surgery, something I’ve never done before and really didn’t even know what to say, but Dr. Kim held my hand and his team gathered around and I felt safe and cared for and the next thing I knew, after “Amen,†I was waking up in recovery feeling lighter & breathing easily.
The only unusual part of the day was standing with Phillip shortly before surgery in the pre-op room and the doctor used a special surgical Sharpie pen to mark my skin for the incisions. Ewww. I tried not to picture what those lines really meant.
When it was time to go home late that night around 10pm, Phillip helped me change. Gown off, we both looked down for the first time and were excited and pleased. No drains. No ugly bandage wraps. Just a little white satin bralette. I felt so adorable. I felt 20 again. “You look awesome,†Phillip exclaimed. Cool!
I dreamed of finally buying a pretty bra with a lovely pattern or wearing something strapless for the first time. When I got home, I wore a cozy PJ top I have never been able to button before. It was exciting!
Interestingly, if anything could go wrong the weeks leading up to surgery, it did. But it wasn’t going to deter me.
I had partially torn my meniscus 
and was in physical therapy 3 times a week in February. Phillip just recovered from another intensive cancer treatment surgery (The Journey) through February & I was drained. My Mom 
tripped 10 days earlier and I was making the 60-mile roundtrip to her house daily to care for her. Then Mom (Tribute to Mom) fell the day of my surgery and injured herself even more. My sister & niece both have bronchitis and my daughter broke her foot in gym this week prompting us to immediately cancel the friends’ homes where she was to stay during my initial recovery. As if that weren’t enough, I haven’t had my period for a year & the night before surgery it came on with full force & was relentless all week. Then a fluke March blizzard delayed my follow-up visit to the surgeon. One thing after another, but you know me. Nothing would stop me & so it is done.
I came home that night, got in bed, put my feet up, snuggled our 3 kitty cats & haven’t moved much since. We inflated a triple-decker queen air mattress in our room with pretty aqua sheets & a pastel butterfly comforter for my little Darling, 
and we’ve been cozying up watching The Flash, enjoying tea & scones, and letting our Boys deal with the chaos in the real world while she & I focus on our *Healing Party.*
(And Mom has Visiting
Angels now).
The reduction was a huge decision, no pun intended. No woman goes into such a major surgery without having given it a great deal of thought. 4 girlfriends went through it and offered words of wisdom. Recovery was quick and, thanks to strong meds, relatively 
comfortable. (Phillip’s med chart > for me.) No stretching, no pushing, no pulling, no lifting, no standing upright for a long time. No driving 
for 2 weeks.
For a busy Mom, it’s actually quite nice to stay in bed for a while.
My gals still “under wraps” as I enjoy a lovely salmon dinner in bed. Phillip has brought me every culinary delight this week & is keeping me on track with infection & pain meds around the clock.
My husband & I met with Dr. Kim a week later for the unveiling. Phillip says the Redesigned Twins are “spellbinding!” Ooh! (blushing). We’re happy, I can breathe & long necklace ornaments will never be bobbling off the center wire of my big brassieres again because those parachutes are all in File 13!
UPDATE: DAY 9
(Warning: Graphic photos ahead intended for mature audiences only)
We visited Dr. Kim yesterday, the one-week checkup since surgery. To be honest, I was afraid to look down & see stitches when the doctor took my bandages off. That’s when Phillip gave me that beautiful compliment above. But today was Day 9 and I seriously needed to shower so this would be my first meeting with my girls.
stared at myself in the mirror for the longest time. I mean, just really stood there and stared. What looked back at me was the most beautiful set of healthy, perky twins with an upturned point you would only see on a mannequin and think, “Yeah, that’s not for real.”
– Thank you, Dr. Kim, for your wisdom & your artistry. Your work is outstanding and you and your
team are the very best and have made me feel light & amazing. 2 things that make Dr. Kim stand out from the rest – he doesn’t like to use drains which I’ve heard are painful to remove a week or more later. And he uses a special technique to help save sensation after healing. Dr. Chang Soo Kim ~ Click: GCSurgeryandLaser 203-920-1444
UPDATE: DAY 18
As one friend who has been through this aptly put it, “Your lady bits are tender now. Drink tea, binge watch & recover.” Good advice & someday soon I’ll be able to lay on my stomach! Photos below of my loving Support Team!! Daily our furbabies skillfully demonstrate how to just lay around & chill.
I would like to thank everyone who is been so encouraging & wonderful especially in helping to pick up our Darling from school, or bring her home after track, or to and from dances, sleepovers & movies, or brought me to the doctor for stitches cleaning/dressing changes or sent goodies or brought dinner, you know who you are & I’m grateful.
Thank you, in particular, to Nayer, Samara, Maria, Anitta, Emily, Melissa, Aimee, Cheryl, Chloe, Mighty Medina’s, Jane, Stephen B., Rose, Ann, Cathy, Sue, Lorine, Julie, Hannah F., John Z., Billy & Shannon, Luz & Lisa, Suzanne, Barry & Sara, thank you all!! Your actions meant a lot!
UPDATE: 1st Summer!
I find it funny that when I’ve run into friends these past two months, the 1st thing they say is, “Hey, how are your boobs!?” So here’s an update: It’s been 4 months since undergoing this major surgery & this major change in my life. It took weeks to drive or even lift my arms above my shoulders. But with each passing month, I’m just happier and so thankful to feel light and look like a normal person in clothes. And it’s not just my new clothes…I’ve been able to “closet shop!” So yes, everything feels different and new because fabrics hang properly now.
The surgeon explained the outside stitches would heal at their own pace and then I could use scar tape across, down & under (left photo) to lighten the marks once the wounds closed. It works very well. He explained, however, that the hundreds of internal stitches are different – they are made of a slow-dissolving material that takes months to dissolve while the soft breast tissue heals. I accidentally pulled out 2 of them when I peeled off the scar tape to shower. Owww! Those stitches were tough & thick like a clear nylon fishing line. Believe me, I peel much slower now!!
In the end, all is wonderful and summer in spaghetti straps is a dream realized. (You can still see the dents in my shoulders above from all those burdensome years…well-endowed ladies, you know what I’m talking about!)
Who knew 32 years ago when I asked my parents if I could paint my walls – I think 
they thought ivory or yellow or something! – that I would paint this picture…check it out – my gals look like that painting!
The Bright Spot– As I mentioned above, it’s 100% all-natural me, just less of me!!!
Questy
Following the market crash & recession, we lost everything. Our cars, jewelry, livelihoods, even a 4th miscarriage. It was a time of great loss. 
To say it was a bleak period is an understatement.
Even our award-winning vintage Adenauer, in the family for over 30 years, was shipped back to Europe as our hearts sunk.
We ended up with real clunkers & a car with water damage just to get around. THE very 1st step to rebuilding our lives was the arrival of this magnificent surprise – rolling in sleek & gleaming…and best of all – smelling clean!! She wasn’t new but she was mine – shiny & safe for the kids! See 1-minute video below:
A polished Nissan Quest that could hold 6 kids on trips to the beach, playground, 
anywhere. I was in Heaven! And how perfect – Quest – by definition, a journey, trip or expedition.
Very soon after her arrival, she earned her name Questy from the kids and referral by the feminine pronoun “she†like a ship. After all, she is like a rocket ship, spaceship, voyager. Even her navigation symbol looks like the red Rocket from Little Einsteins, a big hit when the kids were pintsized. A gliding tinted mini spaceship on wheels.
I was super thrilled & still am these 200,000 miles. From toddlers to teens, we’ve had the best of times cruising around to wonderful places. A memory-making kid mobile filled with music, movies, laughter, kittens, puppies & dollies. Perfect for luxurious travel with adults or sparkling with the happy vivacity of kids.
And on occasion, Batman ditches the Batmobile to cruise in Questy who comfortably accommodates his signature cowl with the pointy ears!
Questy came with 5 sunroofs, 2 TVs, an awesome sound & DVD entertainment system, drilled performance rotors, run-flat tires, Bluetooth, comfy 2nd row leather captain’s chairs and 65 other amazing features that would bore you if I listed them. You can look them up online.
Oh, seriously, how could anyone be this excited about a minivan? Well, I was because there’s so much more to the back story but that’s for another time.
Ultimately, she’s trustworthy, reliable, great in the snow, with a super-sized, mega-view windshield, just an amazing vehicle all around with her airy cabin, polka dot rear cameras & rounded design, nothing boxy like a regular van. 
And believe me, I know what I love in a vehicle! I’ve enjoyed wonderful cars throughout the years ~ my 1st car at 16, a new Camaro Z-28 in sparkly midnight blue with a t-top & the coolest silver seats. Then my 1st stick-shift 2-seater, a zippy MR2, followed by Mercedes’ in white, slate grey, black, ivory, green, maroon, champagne and even matching silver, BMW & Bentley Mulsanne. Questy floats like the Mulsanne.
And the lovely painted license plate, a gift from the Mayor of Wolcott, during my year: http://www.theletstalkmom.com/missconnecticut/
People often ask how do I keep her so clean? It’s pretty easy really; I just ask the kids any time they leave the car to grab an item on the way out. And for wet skiis, sandy beach suits, muddy gear, I
line the back with a large thin plastic party table cloth from the dollar store. A $1 covering in a pretty color, perfect. I keep a supply in the trunk.
And for Mother’s Day, I know a lot of women who might prefer Springtime flowers or a lovely luncheon. But my husband had something custom made for Questy – these gorgeous honeycomb mats ~ and I love them!!
The mats cover every part of the vehicle wall to wall, back to front. Love!! Perfect for this floating Goddess of the Road! Every inch of comfort is a necessity when you sit in the car as much as I do…nearly 200,000 miles…most of it waiting for kids to finish up school or heading to piano, track, ballet, summer camps, tennis, swimming, beaches & playdates and, with our youngest, countless hours back & forth to NYC for her career.
Questy is a rolling office, a spacious mobile command center loaded with every convenience from hot spots & Netflix to laptops, Smartphones, chromebooks, backrest Ipad holders, charging stations, you name it, she’s got it. The kids have been enjoying the space & amenities for years. Here are some pics of our daughter from 1st Grade, 4th Grade, and 6th – 8th Grades using these long commutes to complete homework & even write an award-winning novella. And, of course, Skyping with friends. I love the photo with the Intrepid in the window. In the night photo, she’s taking a class with a teacher via Facetime!!!
Um, yeah, that’s a ship surrounded by wild kraken in her hair ~ a cool October photoshoot with the amazing creative team of The New York Times.
With her many skylights, Questy is always bright & cheery even on rainy days.
I snapped these beautiful raindrops recently. They don’t even look real!!
If I won the lottery, I would have the entire engine & undercarriage made brand new so her odometer read “1.†I would also buy a new driver’s seat because 6 years ago I watched a <<mechanic swing out of the front seat breaking the frame but he wouldn’t fix it. I’ve been sitting on an uneven cushion & backrest for years. It makes my back ache and my hips & spine feel crooked now but apparently a motorized seat for that car with installation is about $3,000 give or take and when you’re coming out of a recession, you just tuck a big, thick piece of fabric under your backside & keep rolling.
There’s always a Bright Spot 
– the silver lining – I left that guy that day and that’s when 
I
found the Service Department at Nissan City of Port Chester, New York and am so very happy!!
Don, John & Thalita take very good care of Questy and me. Vasco and Brian make sure every detail is covered so she’s running smoothly.
Ozzie, the owner of Nissan City of Port Chester, is simply marvelous and helpful and we are so fortunate to have found this golden dealership & service department!
And that keeps this Nissan-driving Mama happy!
Pumpkin Henge
“Do you smell that, Mommy?” I wasn’t smelling anything, I was heading into
Party City for a dolphin balloon, last errand of the evening, my mind racing with the day’s events. “Smell what, Honey,” I asked, clutching her little, warm hand in mine as we weaved through the busy parking lot.
“Autumn.”
I stopped immediately between the safety of parked cars and looked at her. “What do you smell?” She looked up at me and then closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “The smokey smell in the crisp air, that smokiness you smell when fireplaces crackle and leaves fall gently outside and we get costumes for Halloween and then the holidays begin!” Then she opened her eyes and smiled serenely.
What a simple delight when we stop everything and listen to our children. When we halt our harried lives and smell the air around us. Yes, just stop and breathe. 
We took the kids to a 150-year-old farm for hayrides & pumpkin picking, corn mazes and strawberry fields…forever…
  
 
The girls worked hard creating their very own Pumpkin Henge: 
After 20 years, I’m turning in my Marilyn outfit to match our daughter as “princess & queen”
as we help coordinate this year’s Fall Festival and organize the costume parade with Batman.
Oh, I do love my Batman!  Click here for more about my very own Caped Crusader: http://theletstalkmom.com/tea-talk-momversations/my-caped-crusader/
The Bright SpotTM Â Â – It’s not just roses we have to slow down for, smell the Autumn, too. 🙂 
